This morning I conducted the funeral of a baby whose mother is seeking asylum in this country following the murder of her husband in her homeland. She had lost contact with her teenage sons, but regained that contact this week through a woman from an opposing tribe who was in the detention centre with her. I can only imagine the pain she and so many thousands like her must be going through. It's hard to know how to help, other than to offer loving kindness. A couple are doing just that in a most beautiful way.
Recently I had some contact with a man from India, who came here illegally in the back of a lorry. He had put his land up as security for the journey. If he is returned to India, he will lose everything and will not be able to support his family. He is unable to work as he is ill, but isn't registered for medical care here, for fear of appearing on the authorities radar. He speaks little English but we have been blessed with having a number of Punjabi and Hindi-speaking Indian families in the congregation, so I've been able to communicate with him, though I think he understands English better than he's letting on. Again, it's hard to know how to help him, but we are trying. We need wisdom.....
Last Sunday night, a homeless guy we've known for many years showed up in church. We haven't seen him for a while. He avoided me, but then I'm nervous when I see him as several handbags have coincidentally disappeared when he has been around. He knows the score - we don't give money, but will buy some food. He also knew better than to ask members of the congregation for money while he was in church. Which is why he stood outside and did it instead. I know because one upset person called me the other night to tell me how pressurised she had felt by him.
While I was in the USA, Nick called to ask for a little advice on how to deal with a man seeking financial help to travel somewhere. He claimed that I knew him (I didn't, but he must have checked out the notice sheet and seen I was out of the country, so couldn't contradict his story). Nick told me yesterday that this guy turned out to be a scammer and that one minister on the southside had given him £300. This is a bad thing. i suspect that minister has now realised this. I've heard so many of these stories over the years ("My daughter has died in Plymouth. Can you give me fifty quid to get there?"). My usual method of dealing with this is either to flatly refuse or to go the extra mile, take them to the bus station, and get a bus ticket with my credit card (they can't get a refund on that) and physically put them on the bus. To date this has a 100% success rate of ensuring that they don't take the bus, as their only intention is to get money. I've advised colleagues to try this, and they are surprised by my caution and that the counsel works so often. One person recently took someone to the bus station, only to have them disappear as he stayed in the ticket queue while his new-found friend went to the loo.
Compassion can't be blind. We need to be "wise as serpents, and gentle as doves", and that requires a lot of thought and prayer.
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